Friday, July 09, 2004
Mallory-Irvine Everest Expedition Update: In late May this expedition reported finding a body in leather boots above 8000 meters on the North Face of Everest. They suspected it wasn't the body of Sandy Irvine--George Mallory's climbing partner on the day he died--but the climber was so ripped up by the fall that killed him that they needed to study the evidence carefully (they then gave the corpse a decent burial on the mountain). Well, now the results are in and the team has concluded that the body is that of Chinese climber Wu Tseng-Yue. Here's the thinking:
It would be hard to imagine finding a body in worse shape. They [the climbing team] described the body as "headless", with severely broken bones. The chest area of the body was heavily damaged. The body was not covered with stones when they found it (i.e., it had not been buried by earlier climbers). The body with broad shoulders was found with shoulders pointing downhill. Only one "leather boot" was found; its size was estimated around 9-10. Nothing was on the wrists (no wristwatch, bracelet, etc.). The climber wore handmade socks and had no gloves on. The hands were black and bone. No harness of any kind was found on or near the body, nor any rope.
History, of course, tells us that only 2 climbers (besides George Mallory) died above 8000 meters on Everest's North Side: Sandy Irvine and Wu Tseng-Yue before 1985. [And] after looking at the evidence, the letters on the lining of the leather boot is WU, as you can see in the picture [below]. All other markings you might see in that picture is just dirt. Studying the picture and the film of the body, you see, lying on his back, head facing downhill on the North Face a climber with one leg touching the Yellow band, the body was essentially demolished by his fall. His head is completely missing and his waist ripped open. Like Mallory, the skin of his thorax was marble white and undamaged by the elements.
The expedition has chosen not to publish (so far) the film and picture of the body they allude to, remembering the outrage which accompanied the commercial exploitation of the grisly pictures of Mallory after he was found. But they will at some point publish a full account of their 2004 hunt for Irvine. It's a grisly yet fascinating business...
Dead Man's Boot: Wu Are You? Not Irvine...
(Photo: EverestNews.Com)
It would be hard to imagine finding a body in worse shape. They [the climbing team] described the body as "headless", with severely broken bones. The chest area of the body was heavily damaged. The body was not covered with stones when they found it (i.e., it had not been buried by earlier climbers). The body with broad shoulders was found with shoulders pointing downhill. Only one "leather boot" was found; its size was estimated around 9-10. Nothing was on the wrists (no wristwatch, bracelet, etc.). The climber wore handmade socks and had no gloves on. The hands were black and bone. No harness of any kind was found on or near the body, nor any rope.
History, of course, tells us that only 2 climbers (besides George Mallory) died above 8000 meters on Everest's North Side: Sandy Irvine and Wu Tseng-Yue before 1985. [And] after looking at the evidence, the letters on the lining of the leather boot is WU, as you can see in the picture [below]. All other markings you might see in that picture is just dirt. Studying the picture and the film of the body, you see, lying on his back, head facing downhill on the North Face a climber with one leg touching the Yellow band, the body was essentially demolished by his fall. His head is completely missing and his waist ripped open. Like Mallory, the skin of his thorax was marble white and undamaged by the elements.
The expedition has chosen not to publish (so far) the film and picture of the body they allude to, remembering the outrage which accompanied the commercial exploitation of the grisly pictures of Mallory after he was found. But they will at some point publish a full account of their 2004 hunt for Irvine. It's a grisly yet fascinating business...
Dead Man's Boot: Wu Are You? Not Irvine...
(Photo: EverestNews.Com)
Mari Cha IV Record-Wrecking Campaign--Another One Bites The Dust: If it looks like a monster and sails like a monster, it's probably a monster. How else to describe Robert Miller's 140-foot sailing machine, Mari Cha IV, the fastest monohull EVER to speed across the oceans? Her latest victim is the West Coast-Hawaii Pacific record. The big schooner sailed from San Francisco to Oahu in just 5 days and 5 hours. That's a 2000 nautical mile crossing at an average of close to 400 miles a day, or more than 16.5 knots average boatspeed. That's multihull territory, so it's no surprise that she didn't just improve the old record, she ripped it to shreds by some 32 hours. MC IV even beat a Matson liner that left San Fran at the same time by some hours. Ouch. So she's got the west-east transat record, the 24-hour record, and now this one. Miller is so excited about this beast that he's planning to make an attempt this winter to become the first monohull to sail around the world nonstop in under 80 days. If you had suggested that might be possible just a year or two ago you would have been laughed out of the bar. Not today...
San Fran Departure: "Say, Bob, I think that Matson liner captain is giving us the finger. Whaddaya say we make him the laughingstock of the merchant marine...?"
San Fran Departure: "Say, Bob, I think that Matson liner captain is giving us the finger. Whaddaya say we make him the laughingstock of the merchant marine...?"
Thursday, July 08, 2004
The Ultimate Golf Course--It's Called "Mongolia": I can't even imagine where the idea for this one came from, but I like it. I like it a lot. Folks, meet Andre Tolme. Right now he is in the home stretch of golfing his way across Mongolia. Yes, Mongolia. All of it. From Choybalsan in the east, to Dund-Us in the west. What's it all about? Here's Tolme's description:
Golf Mongolia is an extraordinary expedition where I walk 1,320 miles (2,100 km) across the country of Mongolia while hitting a golf ball. Some may call this extreme golf, adventure expressionism, or just plain crazy, but one thing is certain; this has never been done before and may never be done again. The country has been divided into 18 holes which follow dirt tracks, rivers, and nomadic herding trails from east to west across the land once ruled by Genghis Khan.
So, how big a golf course does Mongolia make? Well, divided into eighteen holes, it is 2,322,000 yards long. What's par? Oh, just 11,880 strokes. To date, Tolme has completed 14 holes over 82 days (and 969 miles) of golfing. He has swung his trusty 3-iron a total of 9503 times, which puts him just 135 strokes over par. The bad news: he's lost a total of 481 balls. Hope they have plenty of curdled yak milk on tap at the 19th hole when this guy gets done...
Tolme On The Tee: "Okay, head down, shoulders square. Watch out for the yak herd out to the left and the yurt off on right..."
Golf Mongolia is an extraordinary expedition where I walk 1,320 miles (2,100 km) across the country of Mongolia while hitting a golf ball. Some may call this extreme golf, adventure expressionism, or just plain crazy, but one thing is certain; this has never been done before and may never be done again. The country has been divided into 18 holes which follow dirt tracks, rivers, and nomadic herding trails from east to west across the land once ruled by Genghis Khan.
So, how big a golf course does Mongolia make? Well, divided into eighteen holes, it is 2,322,000 yards long. What's par? Oh, just 11,880 strokes. To date, Tolme has completed 14 holes over 82 days (and 969 miles) of golfing. He has swung his trusty 3-iron a total of 9503 times, which puts him just 135 strokes over par. The bad news: he's lost a total of 481 balls. Hope they have plenty of curdled yak milk on tap at the 19th hole when this guy gets done...
Tolme On The Tee: "Okay, head down, shoulders square. Watch out for the yak herd out to the left and the yurt off on right..."
TWC Quick Hits--Darwin Edition: The 2004 Darwin Awards--which salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who accidentally kill themselves in really stupid ways--are out. Here's a sample:
Moon Shot: Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles.
I can understand the passengers shooting the moon, but the pilot...?
D'Oh: A 22-year-old Reston, VA man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped one end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. "The length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground," Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was "Major trauma."
I guess "Major stupidity" is not an official coroner's category...
Here, catch!: A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend, no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate, was hospitalized.
What's the big deal? We play snakeball at our house all the time...
"Okay, I'll play. But if you drop me again, or try to throw a spitball, I swear..."
Moon Shot: Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles.
I can understand the passengers shooting the moon, but the pilot...?
D'Oh: A 22-year-old Reston, VA man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped one end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. "The length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground," Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was "Major trauma."
I guess "Major stupidity" is not an official coroner's category...
Here, catch!: A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend, no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate, was hospitalized.
What's the big deal? We play snakeball at our house all the time...
"Okay, I'll play. But if you drop me again, or try to throw a spitball, I swear..."
Political Dissent, Wetass-Style--Dare 2 Bare: Leave it to the women of Marin County, CA to devise a nude, I mean novel, style of protest. Everyone knows that in an age of Paris Hilton and media clutter if you want to get noticed you have to, well, get naked. Hence: "Naked For Peace." What does this dangerous, subversive group do? It organizes groups of 50 or so women, who gather at a variety of Cali locales (hopefully warm), strip down and spell out protest slogans with their bodies. Creative stuff, like "PEACE," and "NO WAR," and "MAKE LOVE NOT WAR." They take photos and post them on their web site. And they get lots of media coverage (see, getting naked always works). Okay, I admit this isn't really a sport. But it does involve wet asses (and it's funny). So sue me...
"Heh-heh. Have you noticed all the FBI surveillance? I bet that perv Ashcroft is up on the cliff right now with some binoculars..."
(Photo courtesy of Larry 'Bat' Tenney/San Francisco)
"Heh-heh. Have you noticed all the FBI surveillance? I bet that perv Ashcroft is up on the cliff right now with some binoculars..."
(Photo courtesy of Larry 'Bat' Tenney/San Francisco)
Wednesday, July 07, 2004
Wetass Toys--The Gibbs "Humdinga": Perhaps it was inevitable. Alan Gibbs, the brains behind the "Aquada" amphibious car (which Richard Branson recently "drove" across the English Channel), has done what all auto designers these days seem to do: designed an SUV. Gibbs' "Humdinga" is a full-time, 5-seat, 4WD SUV on land. But with the flip of a switch it turns into an amphibious assault ship that rockets across water. Gibbs is not the kind of guy who skimps on power. This thing will do more than 70 mph on terra firma, and almost 40 mph on the local river. Natural SUV questions: is it more prone to rollover? And how will "Aquada" drivers fare when they collide with a "Humdinga"? Finally, how long before Governor Arnold buys one...?
Humdinga Hijinks: "Hey, 10 points if you run over that duck, and then I think I see a fisherman we can scare the crap out of..."
Humdinga Hijinks: "Hey, 10 points if you run over that duck, and then I think I see a fisherman we can scare the crap out of..."
Wetass Video Of The Week...: Monster waves. Peahi, Maui. The world's best big wave surfers. Check out this trailer for "The Ride Of The Day" (click here for Quicktime; here for Windows Media). Signature Surfer Zen quote: "Everything's alright until it isn't." It's worth the download wait...
(Courtesy of Surfer Magazine)
(Courtesy of Surfer Magazine)
Anne Quemere's Transatlantic Odyssey--Going Nowhere Slowly: Well, time to check in again on French rower Anne, who's attempting to become the first woman to row the Atlantic (or any ocean, for that matter) both ways. She's 33 days in and has pulled herself 953 miles down the track, with 2301 miles to go, so she's not even a third of the way home (this "sport" requires some serious stubbornness). The Ocean Rowing Society has got all the charts and stats if you want to see what she's up against. So, are you having fun, Anne? Let's check your dispatch from June 30 to see:
"I had to face a very rough sea with winds of 40 Kts or even more. Under these conditions, I cannot leave the Connetable drift north, facing possible head winds and ice. Attached to the floating anchor, the boat made my life miserable all night, resounding like a drum under the beating of the breakers. I trust the boat but still I have never heard the rope of the anchor mewing and screeching with such force. Hours were passing by slowly as I was trying to stay calm, having done all I could, everything was in order aboard and, laying down, I was trying to take some rest while staying alert to the outside noises. I was under the impression that the wind was turning SW. It happened without warning, probably due to crosswinds. The boat capsized and I was stuck to the ceiling for what appeared to be a century. Astounded but remaining alert, I felt the boat self-straightening. This has happened before, but experience does nothing to alleviate the fear that takes you over in the solitude. I know it may happen again now or later but, if I could, I should like to erase such moments from my memory."
Hmm, I guess not. To make matters worse, Anne spent about 4 days going in circles, and on Saturday turned on her GPS to discover that she had LOST 50 miles, thanks to a Gulf Stream eddy which took her backwards. Did I mention ocean rowing requires maniacal persistence? To be a lone rower on a big ocean is to be perhaps the greatest underdog in extreme sport. So TWC is starting to root heavily for Anne, who has dealt with all the frustrations so far with stoicism, grace, and even wit...
Atlantic Anne: Last seen a month ago...Next sighting: ???
"I had to face a very rough sea with winds of 40 Kts or even more. Under these conditions, I cannot leave the Connetable drift north, facing possible head winds and ice. Attached to the floating anchor, the boat made my life miserable all night, resounding like a drum under the beating of the breakers. I trust the boat but still I have never heard the rope of the anchor mewing and screeching with such force. Hours were passing by slowly as I was trying to stay calm, having done all I could, everything was in order aboard and, laying down, I was trying to take some rest while staying alert to the outside noises. I was under the impression that the wind was turning SW. It happened without warning, probably due to crosswinds. The boat capsized and I was stuck to the ceiling for what appeared to be a century. Astounded but remaining alert, I felt the boat self-straightening. This has happened before, but experience does nothing to alleviate the fear that takes you over in the solitude. I know it may happen again now or later but, if I could, I should like to erase such moments from my memory."
Hmm, I guess not. To make matters worse, Anne spent about 4 days going in circles, and on Saturday turned on her GPS to discover that she had LOST 50 miles, thanks to a Gulf Stream eddy which took her backwards. Did I mention ocean rowing requires maniacal persistence? To be a lone rower on a big ocean is to be perhaps the greatest underdog in extreme sport. So TWC is starting to root heavily for Anne, who has dealt with all the frustrations so far with stoicism, grace, and even wit...
Atlantic Anne: Last seen a month ago...Next sighting: ???
Tuesday, July 06, 2004
Wetass Sport #253--Wife Carrying: Here's one they should definitely add to the Olympics (my vote: bump synchronized swimming). The basics: race 830 feet, through a pool and over hurdles, carrying your wife. First prize (and this really drives up the appeal)--the wife's weight...in beer (plus a sauna to help with the resulting hangover). Credit for coming up with this creative competition goes to the idle Finns who live in the little hamlet of Sonkajarvi, just shy of the Arctic Circle (too much darkness, too much snow, too much chilled vodka, too little to do). The origins of the race lie in the 19th century local tradition of raiding neighboring villages and carrying women off. And on Saturday the seventh annual world championships was staged. Eighteen couples competed in front of 7,000 spectators. And the contest was won by an Estonian couple, Madis Uusorg and Inga Klauso, in a blazing time of just over a minute. Their secret weapon: the "Estonian carry," in which Inga clamped her thighs tightly to either side of Madis' face and hung upside down on his back. Hmm, I wonder how they came up with that one...
The British Contingent: "Dammit, Edina, you're supposed to wait until after the competition to fill up on beer. And look! Georgina is carrying her bleeding purse..."
(Photo: Lehtikuva/Reuters)
The British Contingent: "Dammit, Edina, you're supposed to wait until after the competition to fill up on beer. And look! Georgina is carrying her bleeding purse..."
(Photo: Lehtikuva/Reuters)
TWC Quick Hits...:
Naked PETA Protesters Join Running Of The Bulls In Pamplona: Ploy partially successful as some bulls stop to compare rings in nose with rings in, uh,...(PS: Go find your own damn pictures; this is a family blog)
100 Year-Old Man Sprints--Sort Of--100 Meters: South African Phillip Rabinowitz puts up time of 28.7 seconds, and breaks world record for age group, only to be told timer wasn't working properly. Manages to avoid stroking out in frustration, and vows to try again in October, after he catches his breath...
Man Gives Wife Driving Lesson; Wife Drives SUV Into Pool: "Goddammit, I said 'Go left'!"
Pool Ornament: "Uhh, sir. I know you're mad, but don't you think we should go pull your wife out of the car about now...?"
(Photo: Richard Ambo/The Honolulu Advertiser)
Naked PETA Protesters Join Running Of The Bulls In Pamplona: Ploy partially successful as some bulls stop to compare rings in nose with rings in, uh,...(PS: Go find your own damn pictures; this is a family blog)
100 Year-Old Man Sprints--Sort Of--100 Meters: South African Phillip Rabinowitz puts up time of 28.7 seconds, and breaks world record for age group, only to be told timer wasn't working properly. Manages to avoid stroking out in frustration, and vows to try again in October, after he catches his breath...
Man Gives Wife Driving Lesson; Wife Drives SUV Into Pool: "Goddammit, I said 'Go left'!"
Pool Ornament: "Uhh, sir. I know you're mad, but don't you think we should go pull your wife out of the car about now...?"
(Photo: Richard Ambo/The Honolulu Advertiser)
Amin Brakk BASE Jump--The Russians Are On The Wall: The Russkie expedition to climb--and then jump off (yes, JUMP; they're Russians)--the Amin Brakk tower in Pakistan is finally fixing rope and working their way up the massive rock wall. And the going ain't easy. Right now BASE jumping is the farthest thing from the climbing team's thoughts, as they suck it up on the difficult, dangerous climb, and dodge the frequent avalanches of rock and snow that come pouring down from the heights when the sun warms the face every day. Here's a report from the weekend:
Yesterday a small avalanche covered the working three-man team: Lastochkin, Kovalev and Dorfman. All of them are safe and sound, but it scared them stiff! Avalanches collapse from the roof. [They] seem to jump out in the air, and this wave of snow flies, actually not touching the wall, directly on you. [F]rom below it is difficult to estimate [whether] it [fall] right away on you or pass by. And it happens in this way a few times a day. We even named these small avalanches - "White dragon".
"White Dragon," huh? Sounds like these guys might have hit some opium dens before they cleared Islamabad...
"Oh man, this thing is so hairy. I wonder if I remembered to pack my hookah..."
Yesterday a small avalanche covered the working three-man team: Lastochkin, Kovalev and Dorfman. All of them are safe and sound, but it scared them stiff! Avalanches collapse from the roof. [They] seem to jump out in the air, and this wave of snow flies, actually not touching the wall, directly on you. [F]rom below it is difficult to estimate [whether] it [fall] right away on you or pass by. And it happens in this way a few times a day. We even named these small avalanches - "White dragon".
"White Dragon," huh? Sounds like these guys might have hit some opium dens before they cleared Islamabad...
"Oh man, this thing is so hairy. I wonder if I remembered to pack my hookah..."
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